Flashback flash blast

DID YOU KNOW? A video of the Connie Chung musical number on the final episode of the news/punditry show Weekends with Maury and Connie has received more views on YouTube than the actual show did, total, during its original six-month run.

You know, how long has it been since I mentioned 30 Rock on this blog? Probably like a week. So I'm mildly spoilered for a guest appearance on tonight's 30 Rock, and if you know me, you know that this is just tearing me up inside. Anyway, I'm super good at not spoiling things, unless it's The Crying Game, so I'm not going to say anymore about this sore subject.

So my first thought on last week's 30 Rock was "did they really get Omarosa to play DeBorah?" Then I found out that they actually didn't get Omarosa to play DeBorah. I was simultaneously relieved and disappointed, like when you're watching Olympic figure skating and nobody falls the entire time. You know, that woman shouldn't actually be famous; she doesn't even deserve to have me write her name in my blog. I'm sorry, society.

Then I saw last night's Colbert Report interview and I went to bed a little confused inside and I didn't know why, but then I woke up this morning and sat in bed half-awake for no less than two hours, debating whether to go running or not, when finally it hit me: Michelle Obama is actually DeBorah from MILF Island! Barack didn't come here to make friends, he came here to be number one! Actually, I guess he's kind of been doing both recently.

Of course, everyone's favorite moment from last week's 30 Rock was chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, ack and, I mean, I have an ex-friend who thinks that Tina Fey is just an inherently unfunny person, and seriously, I don't know how anybody can think that after watching her transform four words, three of which are the same and one of which is an onomatopoeia for strangulation, I guess, into pure comedy gold. And when she sticks her tongue out in the last half-second of that scene? She inscribes her name upon the Emmy.

Anyway, further confirming that Tina Fey is actually a gnome that lives inside my brain and steals my ideas and life experiences in magic bubbles, as soon as I saw this scene I had a flashback to second grade in Miss Rita Hunt's class. It was near the end of the school year and we were all filling out some sort of personality profile or test or something, and one of the questions was "What is your favorite comic strip?" I don't know how it's even physically possible that I could have answered anything other than Calvin and Hobbes, because seriously, it was 1994, but for some unknown reason I decided to write down Cathy. Cathy was my favorite comic strip when I was in second grade.

Oh, wait, you know what? I do know why I wrote down Cathy. It's all coming back to me now. Because the question was not just "What is your favorite comic strip?" it was "What is your favorite comic strip... and why?" And do you know what eight-year-old Young Sam wrote down in response to that question?

"Cathy. Her views on shopping and men."

Nature, nurture, who's to say? But let it be known that when I was eight years old, my favorite comic strip was Cathy, because of her views on shopping and men. And really, as far as I can remember, that was the very first sign that I was ever interested in things such as shopping and men. And chocolate. Chocolate chocolate. Ack!